The 4 Horsemen of Divorce (Gottman Explained FAST)
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YouTubeBecoming a Therapist
According to couples therapist Dr. John Gottman, the Four Horsemen, behavioral predictors of divorce or break-up, are criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling. Dr. Gottman conducted additional research in 1999 where he predicted divorce with 90% accuracy based on the first three minutes of a conversation. What he noticed was that couples who started their conflict conversation with criticism and elicited defensiveness in their partner ended up divorcing vs. couples who used gentle st
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According to couples therapist Dr. John Gottman, the Four Horsemen, behavioral predictors of divorce or break-up, are criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling. Dr. Gottman conducted additional research in 1999 where he predicted divorce with 90% accuracy based on the first three minutes of a conversation. What he noticed was that couples who started their conflict conversation with criticism and elicited defensiveness in their partner ended up divorcing vs. couples who used gentle st
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Defensiveness is one of Gottman's Four Horsemen of relationship rupture. But it's also a protective mechanism. The question isn't whether you're being defensive. The question is what it's protecting. The answer is usually this: discomfort. Avoidance and projection are two of the most common coping mechanisms in the world. And the reason they're so common is because they work — they take away discomfort in the moment. But they don't heal anything. And they don't connect you. Get curious about whe
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